Burning/Freezing Lips
You can't be a poet or muse unless you can produce extreme lip temperature at will

What We Do
We thread two sets of capillary tubing beneath the surface of your lips, and in the corner of your mouth we insert 2 tiny sacs of, respectively, liquid nitrogen and sulphuric acid.

How it Works
Working with the muscles around your mouth, we create an ingenious hydraulic control system: Pucker up, and the acid is squeezed into one tube;press your lips together, and the nitrogen takes your kiss-temperature into absolute-zero regions.

(warning: may cause some blistering)

Yearning Lips
This one had us scratching our heads for some time. In the end, we figured that for lips to be in a state of 'yearning', they would need to be making a repeated series of goldfish-like moues.

What We Do
After some experimentation, we discovered that replacing the lips with a goat's sphincter did the trick - a tiny power supply unit located in the nostril can deliver sufficient random electric stimulation to make these false lips gape and pucker most appropriately.

Hair Golden Lips Like Cherries
No can do, I'm afraid, pace Bobby G, Tom Jones et. al. It's a basic category mistake involving colours, materials and shape. So stop asking us for it.